And now for a joint lesson in cartography, arithmetic, and etymology! (silly)

Earthbound is full of educational things like this.
Who could forget such bulletins as these?

Whoops: AaaARGH, no café!

 So, realizing that I had not started my coffee brewing (as I should have done last night) I decided to do just that.

Problem is, I have forgotten where my brew container's cork is.

This wouldn't be a problem if it weren't for the fact that the carafe is a strange size, and therefore I need to be exacting in my measurements.

I decided to try Mason jars, but they aren't big enough, nor do I have nearly enough of them to fill it.

My pitcher won't work either; as much as I love my coffee, I don't need my Gatorade tasting like it.

I can't climb stepladders right now—I tried it, found it incredibly painful.  So I can't check my shelves.

I'm going to have to come up with something.  I NEED my coffee and soon.